


Schooled

by Paladin_Butters



Category: South Park
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cartman being an asshole, Cussing, Eventual Kyle/Stan, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Smut, F/M, Heartbreak, Kyle is an angsty teen, M/M, More tags as the story goes on, School, Teacher-Student Relationship
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-11-09
Updated: 2017-01-06
Packaged: 2018-08-29 23:27:41
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8509744
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Paladin_Butters/pseuds/Paladin_Butters
Summary: Kyle Broflovski is a senior and new student at South Park High School. He moved from New Jersey all the way to Colorado. Not being thrilled about leaving his hometown and friends behind near the end of the school year, Kyle starts off at his new school angry and stubborn. The current health teacher is retiring, but due to health reasons he leaves early. As a replacement, the school brings in Stan Marsh, who is fresh out of college and just scored his first teaching job. Kyle didn't know how much a teacher could affect him.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I really like student/teacher AUs so I figured I'd write one. I don't know where it'll take me, but I hope it's somewhere good!
> 
> Rated M right now, but will be E eventually
> 
> I don't own South Park!

Kyle thought it was stupid that his family was moving to the middle of no where. He never even heard of the town he's moving to. Fucking South Park, Colorado. He's lived in New Jersey all his life. Kyle hadn't even left his hometown before now. 

 

What sucked the most for Kyle is that it's close to the end of his senior year. How is he supposed to catch up with the requirements for this new school? Kyle snorted to himself, remembering that he could've graduated his junior year at his old school, but opted out because he wanted to graduate with his class. From what his mom told him, he really only needs four classes to graduate from South Park High.

 

If his mom was right, he'll be on half days taking English, gym, history, and health class. It doesn't seem too bad except for the fact that there isn't a health teacher for that school at the moment.

 

"Are you excited to start a new school, bubbie?" Shelia asked, turning around in the passenger seat. Her eyes held a hopeful look, but Kyle gave her a glare.

 

"No." was all he said to her. He wasn't excited, not at all.

 

"Aw cheer up Kyle, this is just a new chapter in your life," his dad said. "You'll meet plenty of new friends, I promise."

 

"Maybe you'll find yourself a nice girl!"

 

Kyle cringed in his seat. His younger brother gave him a questioning look but he shrugged it off. Unbeknownst to his family, Kyle was gay. No one even knew because Kyle kept it that way. He hadn't even told his best friend David back in New Jersey.

 

"Yeah, sure, whatever mom." He mumbled.

 

He was gay, diabetic, and Jewish. How was he supposed to make friends in this redneck town?

 

"Why'd we even have to move in the first place?" Kyle groaned.

 

"Your father was offered a good job here, Kyle. You know that."

 

Kyle rolled his eyes and proceeded to look out the window. They'll be arriving at their new house in a matter of minutes. The house looked nice in the pictures his parents showed him. He won't have to share a room with Ike anymore, so that's a plus.

 

"We're almost there boys!" His father said turning a corner and into a neighborhood.

 

It seems like a small town. People saw a car with a trailer hitched on the back driving slowly down the street, and they got out of their houses to call other neighbors. People stared at them until the car stopped in front of an olive green house.

 

"This is it," Sheila smiled. "Welcome to your new house!"

 

The four of them got out of the car and several of their new neighbors started walking towards them.

 

"I'm so not liking this," Kyle said under his breath.

 

A man wearing a dress shirt with a tie approached Kyle's father. He held his hand out and shook Gerald's hand.

 

"I'm Steven Stotch," he greeted cheerfully. A woman and a boy Kyle's age stood next to him. "That's my wife Linda, and our son Butters."

 

"Oh nice to meet you, I'm Gerald and that's my wife Sheila," he then gestured to his sons. "Those are our two boys, Kyle and Ike."

 

While his parents and the new neighbors talked, Butters came up to Kyle.

 

"H-Hiya! I'm Butters! My real name is Leopold, but everyone calls me Butters!"

 

"Hi Butters, I'm Kyle." Kyle forced himself not to roll his eyes. They just did introductions!

 

"Where ya from?" Butters had the brightest blue eyes Kyle had ever seen. "A-And what grade are ya?"

 

"My family's from New Jersey. My dads a lawyer and was offered a job out here and so he took it. Oh, and I'm senior."

 

Butters smiled real big. "You must be the new kid everyone's talking about! They're saying how you're so smart that you get half days because you only need a few more classes to graduate!"

 

Kyle rubbed the back of his neck, "oh uhmm, sure I guess. Talk gets around fast here."

 

"In small town it sure does," Butters mashed his knuckles together. "You're on the roster in my health class! Seventh period!"

 

"Oh that's cool, I don't have a schedule yet. I'm not sure what hour I have my other classes." Kyle said, noticing the light dusting of freckles on Butters' cheeks.

 

"You'll get your schedule on Monday from Mr. Mackey, then the principles will show you around."

 

Kyle nodded then his mother walked up, "see Kyle, you're already making friends! You'll have plenty of time to get to know each other, but first you have to unpack."

 

He and Butters said their goodbyes, then Kyle went to help bring things in.

 

It took several hours, but they got everything unpacked. It's just like it was back home in New Jersey, except it's different. Kyle sort of likes the change, yet at the same time he despises the fact he left everything and everyone he's ever known back.

 

"Are you ready to start school Monday?" His father asked.

 

Kyle shrugged. It'll be a new opportunity to meet people that won't think he's a freak already. Or, at least he hopes so.

 

 

 

Kyle couldn't sleep Sunday night. He was rather nervous about school. Tomorrow is the only day he has to go to school early. The rest of the year he'll be arriving at 10:30 AM, the end of third hour but the beginning of fourth. Kyle has classes fourth through seventh hour.

 

It felt like as soon as he fell asleep, his alarm went off. Kyle grumbled angrily and shoved his blankets off. He walked out of his room and down the hall to the bathroom. The knobs to the shower squeaked as he turned them to find the right temperature. Kyle shed his pajamas and stepped into the warm shower, getting out to pee. The thought of people pissing in the shower grossed him out.

 

Kyle dried his curly red hair and proceeded to dress himself. He went downstairs to make himself a bowl of cereal and that's when his father stopped him.

 

"Y'know Kyle," Gerald started. "You should be proud of yourself. You were given the chance to graduate early, but decided not to. Because you did this, you're going to have new people enter your life now and hopefully find the right people that influence you to do good things with your life."

 

"Dad, it's a bit early for one of your life lessons." Kyle walked past him and made his breakfast.

 

Ike and his mom were already at the table talking about his new school. Kyle sat down next to Ike with his bowl of cereal and listen to his mother fret over Ike.

 

"Kyle, you look so handsome!"

 

He looked down at his plaid sweater and scrunched his face. He always wore something decent to school, he wasn't sure why his mom was commenting on it.

 

"Thanks mom."

 

"The bus stop is just down the street from the house, it should be here soon. Are you ready?" His mother rambled on.

 

"As ready as I'll ever be," Kyle huffed.

 

Shelia smiled at her eldest son and kissed his cheek. Kyle groaned then got up to wipe the lipstick off. Once he was sure the red tint was gone, he grabbed his backpack, said his goodbyes, and walked out the door.

 

The cold air hit him and he zipped his orange jacket up. It was nearly March and it was still snowing. As he walked down the street, snow crunched under his boots. Once he reached his bus stop he recognized Butters, but there was some other kid there.

 

The kid was taller than Kyle, he had a bright orange jacket with the hood up.

 

"Kyle!" Butters greeted him. "Are you excited for school?"

 

"Not particularly," he answered honestly.

 

Butters frowned, "it'll be okay!"

 

"Thanks Butters. Who's this?" He gestured to the tall kid.

 

"Oh! That's Kenny!"

 

"'Sup," Kenny said but was muffled by the hood.

 

"I'm Kyle."

 

Kenny looked up and down Kyle's frame and smirked, "you must be a bottom."

 

"Excuse me?" Kyle boggled by Kenny's statement.

 

"You've got a _wicked_ ass."

 

Kyle's cheeks burned bright, and it wasn't just the colds fault. He couldn't think of anything smart to say back, so he ignored Kenny for the time being. Just before Kenny could say anything else, the bus pulled up and they got on.

 

Kyle sat alone, preparing himself for the long day he had.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The only warning in this chapter is Cartman just pointing out that Kyle is Jewish repeatedly. Other than that, it's a safe read for now I suppose.

It was a short bus ride to the school, though Kyle wished it was a little longer. The school itself was small. It only had one story to it. The town was a lot smaller than what Kyle was used to back in New Jersey.

 

Butters and Kenny were waiting for Kyle to get off the bus.

 

"You guys waited for me?" Kyle asked.

 

Butters smiled and said, "of course we were! We wouldn't let you find your way around the school by yourself."

 

"An ass like yours needs someone, aka me, to show you around." Kenny smirked.

 

"Could you stop talking about my ass, please? And I thought the principals were showing me around."

 

"Cool your jets, they are, but we're your friends."

 

Kyle felt his heart swell when Kenny said friends.

 

Kenny took his hood off when they entered the building. He had dirty blond hair and vibrant blue eyes. Kyle noticed that Kenny had a small gap in his front teeth. He thought Kenny was actually quite handsome.

 

The students took double takes at Kyle as the trio walked down the halls. Kyle felt himself get nervous. This was a small school where everyone knew everyone.

 

"Don't worry Kyle, we're almost to PC Principal's office." Butters said kindly, as he noticed how nervous he was.

 

Butters knocked on the door and moments later a man wearing a blue polo shirt answered. "Hello I'm PC Principal, you must be our new student Kyle Broflovski."

 

"Yeah, that's me." Kyle answered.

 

"I see you have some of our fellow students showing you around." PC Principal nodded his head towards Kenny and Butters. "I trust they've been polite to you."

 

"They've been fine, I just want to get this over with and-"

 

"And what Mr. Broflovski? Leave? I don't like that attitude of yours, you better get rid of it quick or that's two weeks detention for you."

 

Kyle lifted his palms up defensively and nervously looked from Butters to Kenny. "I didn't have an attitude. I'm still unhappy about moving out here to the middle of nowhere."

 

"I understand that, I do, but life is full of disappointments Mr. Broflovski."

 

A tall, slender man walked into the office. He had piercing grey eyes and jet black hair. Kyle felt his blood run cold when they made eye contact.

 

"Good morning PC Principal. Causing trouble again McCormick?" The man asked.

 

"Not today Tucker," Kenny answered. "I gotta stay on my best behavior for my buddy Kyle."

 

"Of course, already trying to corrupt the smartest kid that's ever walked down these halls."

 

"Whoa, the smartest?" Kyle questioned.

 

"You see Mr. Broflovski, no one at this school has ever had half days because they were  _ smart _ , they had half days because they were so dumb, or caused too much trouble," Mr. Tucker's eyes narrowed at Kenny.

 

Kyle almost felt flattered in a strange way, but also felt a strong urge of guilt. He pushed the feelings aside to ask this man just who he was.

 

"And you are, sir?" Kyle asked.

 

"Mr. Tucker, your vice principal. Are you ready for your tour?" 

 

Kyle nodded, "yes please."

 

PC Principal lifted his sunglasses up, and placed them on the back of his head. "You two; McCormick and Stotch, get to class or two weeks of detention."

 

Butters waved as he hurried off to his class and Kenny winked at Kyle before saying, "see ya later newbie."

 

Mr. Tucker cringed at Kenny, "that kid makes my skin crawl."

 

Kyle sensed some sort of hatred coming from his vice principal, like he hated Kenny. He wondered if something went down between them, or if Kenny was just generally a trouble causing kid. 

 

"Mr. Tucker will take you to Mackey and from there show you to your classes," PC Principal said. "I, on the other hand, have to deal with Leslie."

 

"Come on Kyle, I haven't got all day." Mr. Tucker said, leaning on the doorway. Kyle followed him out and walked a step behind.

 

"You're going to be the valedictorian, you know that right?"

 

"I didn't. I didn't even expect to be the smartest kid at this school."

 

Mr. Tucker flashed a strange grin at him, "it's a damn shame you're a senior."

 

It was a series of lefts to get to Mackey's office. The door was open, so they just went in.

 

"Good morning mmkay," the man said. "Here's your schedule Kyle, hope you have a good day mmkay. I'm sorry it's a short introduction, but Clyde is coming in soon and he'll need me all day."

 

"Thank you," he said in a small voice.

 

"See you later Mr. Mackey," his vice principal waved as they left.

 

As the two walked to Kyle's first class Mr. Tucker stopped for a moment, "are you 18 yet?"

 

"No sir, I will be in May though."

 

Mr. Tucker nodded slowly with a small smirk. "Let's see that schedule of yours. History with Mr. Cartman, ugh I can't stand him."

 

"Why's that?" Kyle questioned as they approached a classroom.

 

Mr. Tucker opened the door and said, "because he's a fat piece of shit."

 

Kyle was shocked at how unfiltered Mr. Tucker was. His teacher stood at a podium, pointing at what seemed to be a watered down introduction of Theodore Roosevelt.

 

"What are you doing in my classroom Craig?" Mr. Cartman hissed.

 

"Showing the new kid around this god forsaken school."

 

Kyle looked at Mr. Cartman and couldn't get over how large this man was. He wasn't ready to say whether or not his new teacher was a piece of shit though.

 

"Oh, right the Jew that's going to be in my fourth hour. I'll have you know that I've never taught a Jew, hell there's never even been a Jew in this town before!"

 

Kyle glared, "how'd you even know I was Jewish?"

 

Mr. Cartman rolled his eyes, "your last name, duh, _Broflovski._ "

 

Mr. Tucker was right, the man in front of him _was_ a fat piece of shit. Kyle was so not ready to be in this class for the rest of the school year.

 

Kyle felt a hand on his back as Mr. Tucker urged him out of the room, before leaving the dark haired man stuck out his middle finger and said, "fuck off Cartman."

 

"Sorry to be unprofessional, but Eric and I go back to when we were kids. He was a jerk, still is, but at least I'm the boss of him now."

 

"Oh, um, it's fine? He doesn't seem like a good teacher if he just assumes religion off of a last name." Kyle answered.

 

"Eric's a fat piece of shit, what did I tell you? What's your next class?"

 

Kyle read his schedule, "it's English, room 115."

 

Mr. Tucker smiled, "Mr. Black, he's one of the best."

 

They walked down a long hall of lockers for about a minute or two, until there was a bus door and a single classroom. Mr. Tucker knocked on the door politely, completely unlike he did for Mr. Cartman. The door opened up moments later.

 

"Mr. Tucker, how're you doing?" He ushered both Kyle and the vice principal into his room. There wasn't any students in this classroom so Kyle figured it was his planning period or something. "Who's this?"

 

"Kyle," Mr. Tucker smiled. "The new student that transferred from New Jersey."

 

"Oh, that's right!" The young man reached out and shook Kyle's hand. "I'm Mr. Black, I'll be your English teacher for the remainder of the year!"

 

"Nice to meet you Mr. Black. Jeez, you already seem ten times better than my fourth hour teacher, Mr. Cartman." Kyle answered.

 

He watched as Mr. Black's eyes went dark, "no one in this whole school likes him. He's a terrible teacher. I've known him since I was a kid."

 

"Mr. Tucker said the same thing. Do you all know each other from when you were younger?"

 

Mr. Tucker sighed, "yes unfortunately. We all grew up in this town; me, Token, Cartman, and Wendy."

 

"How is it that you all became teachers at the same school?"

 

"It's pretty much the only thing to do in this town once you graduate high school," Mr. Black answered.

 

"Oh great," Kyle said sarcastically. "My next class is gym with Miss. Testaburger."

 

"That's Wendy," Mr. Tucker said with a bored tone. "At least she's not  _ too _ bad."

 

Kyle raised an eyebrow and followed Mr. Tucker once again. They said goodbye to his English teacher as he walked them to the door.

 

"Why is it that you haven't taken gym yet?"

 

"Ah, well," Kyle tried to think of an excuse other than he didn't want to take gym. "I'm not the most athletic guy."

 

 

The gym was at the front of the school near PC Principal's office. Peering through the windows on the door, Kyle could already tell that this school spends nearly all its funding on sports. It wasn't a coincidence that this was the nicest part of this run down school.

 

Mr. Tucker held the door to the gymnasium open for Kyle. Miss. Testaburger saw them entering and jogged over to greet them. She immediately grabbed Kyle's hand for a firm handshake.

 

"Hey Kyle! Welcome to South Park High! I'm Miss. Testaburger, hope Craig's been treating you good."

 

"Mr. Tucker's been just fine, uh thank you?" Kyle shrugged.

Craig rolled his eyes at Wendy. She had always been a high strung girl growing up, and she  _ still _ is. Ever since Wendy turned him down at their high school prom to go with Eric Cartman, of all people, they barely got along. It's only gotten worse as adults. It doesn't matter now for Craig since he's come out as gay.

 

"Come along Broflovski, it's a school gym. They're all the same, even the teachers," his eyes narrowed at Wendy.

 

"What's your last class kid?" She asked before Craig whisked him away.

 

"Health," Kyle answered. "There's no name for a teacher though."

 

"That's because we have new health teacher," Wendy replied. "He's fresh out of college and just started today. In way, he's just like you, starting up at new school halfway into the year."

 

Kyle just sorta nodded before Craig pushed him out of the gym.

 

"Last class to show you to, and then you're free."

 

"Free to do what exactly?" Kyle questioned.

 

"Go home, wander around the school, I don't care."

 

"Go home?"

 

"This was just a tour to show you  _ your _ classes. There's only four you go to, and technically it's not even your first day."

 

"Oh, yeah. Cool."

 

The health room was three doors down and across the hall from the gym. The door was propped open and voices could be heard from inside.

 

_ "My favorite color is blue, does anyone else have something to ask?" _

 

Craig knocked on the open door to get the new teachers attention. When they walked in, Kyle almost stopped dead in his tracks. This man was gorgeous. All Kyle wanted to do was stare at him all day. He was tall, with a muscular physique, and dark hair that brought out playful blue eyes.

 

"Oh, hey there Mr. Tucker, how's it going?" He asked.

 

"All is well Mr. Marsh, I've brought you the other newbie in this school."

 

Mr. Marsh was at the chalkboard, it appeared that he was writing things about himself. He shook Kyle's hand, and it made Kyle want to never let go.

 

"Kyle's going to be in your seventh hour class."

 

"You're the kid with the half days, right?"

 

"Yep that's me."

 

"That's so cool, Kyle. I was told you're the smartest kid at this school."

 

"So was I," Kyle glanced at the vice principal.

 

Mr. Marsh grinned at him, "sorry to cut it short guys, but I gotta get back to my class."

 

Kyle let out rough sigh as he and Mr. Tucker left the classroom. Craig started walking off towards his office, "see ya tomorrow Broflovski."

 

Fuck, Kyle thought, this school year is going to suck.

 

He called his mom and asked her to pick him up since he didn't have to stay. Kyle waited for about twenty minutes for his mom to arrive at the school.

 

"How was it?" She asked.

 

"It was good," he lied. "I've got good teachers, and the kids are nice." He couldn't stop thinking about that health teacher.

 

Mr. Marsh was going to be the end of him.


End file.
